Here’s an overview of the remaining 6 principles. “How can I talk to my spouse about her bad habit and not make her unhappy?” Use the word “and” to frame your question, e.g. Get clear on what you truly want, what you truly don’t want, and figure out how to achieve both objectives. ![]() It is possible to voice your concerns, while maintaining respect or a positive relationship. During crucial conversations, we feel threatened, our brains shut down, and we’re even more likely to settle for the Fool’s Choice. The better approach is to realize that the options are not mutually-exclusive. talk to your spouse about her bad habit and make her unhappy, or avoid the topic altogether). (b) REFUSE THE FOOL’S CHOICE. Often, we mistakenly think there are only two options (e.g. In our full Crucial Conversations summary, we’ll explain how to break down your goals and re-examine your motives, to refocus on what truly matters.
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